February 2011
62 posts
5 tags
How Many Assholes Can You Find?
Said fuck it and threw on the old camera during a sample trip from the train station. There were no shortages of douches on location - myself included.
3 tags
“We just don’t have any cars that work.”
– Conductor on MTA at 7:17pm on Monday January 31, 2011
January 2011
92 posts
5 tags
At Least Someone Is Having Fun With All This...
This guy must have been on a mission to NOT get laid. I can only imagine that his quest was successful beyond a reasonable doubt. What a shame all that extended cab will never get a good carpet matting.
8 tags
NY MTA Might Actually Be Held Accountable For...
Via CBS Local NY:
Fuck these incredulous mothercluckers. In my honest, they do not give a flying fuck. Sure, some dude sitting in a warm office making schedules MIGHT, but not the people on the ground making decisions about how to rectify a situation. Sometimes, they manage to prepare and deliver, however that is extremely rare. Well, now they asses are gettin’ sued!
Now, a Manhattan...
6 tags
Dear Train Announcer,
Wanted to take this opportunity to thank you for being just plain awful at your job. In case you hadn’t noticed from your toasty office, it’s 15 fucking degrees (F) outside. Also, in case you hadn’t noticed, the 7:15 train has not arrived. Yes, that would be us, the idiot commuters standing around in this cold, just waiting for a goddamn train, or even an announcement about where...
8 tags
Dil Gosal acts for Norman Segundo and Gerardo...
EDITOR’S NOTE - Direct from the Lawyer’s mouth in regards to the assault in Vancouver posted here. The truth? Only time will tell.
————————————————————
Dil Gosal acts for Norman Segundo and Gerardo Arguello in Road Rage Charges North Vancouver
By admin, 28...
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Close Call or Cadaverous?
Via CarAdvice.au:
There’s no way anyone could have lived through this accident in West Palm Beach, right? G’head, guess. Your answer is here.
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How To...
Not get involved in dumb altercations.
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This Should Have Been Assault With a Deadly Weapon
Via Hastings Observer:
A SCAFFOLDER has been jailed after headbutting another driver in a road rage attack.
Robbie Cook, 26, stormed out of his Land Rover in Queens Road on November 24 and assaulted a delivery man.
Fortunately the victim was not seriously hurt but was left shaken up after the incident. Cook drove away from the scene but was arrested after police officers spotted him in...
6 tags
They Call Me The Dentist
Via This Is Stafordshire:
DENTIST Shaun Edwards has been suspended from practising for 12 months after he broke a pensioner’s cheekbone and knocked out two of his teeth in a road rage attack.
Me thinks he was just trying to get some additional business.
Edwards, aged 44, appeared before the General Dental Council’s professional conduct committee in London yesterday after he was...
7 tags
This Can't Be The MTA's First Rodeo
It must have snowed before. You must have had to run trains while/after snowing. You must have known it was going to snow. You must be the world’s most lazy fucking organization - ever. First of all, the trains were 20-25 minutes late. Why? There were no electrical malfunctions or anything like that. Then you make every pack into the train cars like Japanese contestants on one of those zany...
He's Lucky That's All He Lost
This is what they mean by, “watch the fucking gap.” www.nypost.com/p/news/local/manhattan/man_leg_severed_by_subway_on_upper_9v5WLJ7i4QgePxtVlG2uxJ
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This Guy Got Canucked Up
Our hooooooser neighbors to the north apparently don’t fuck around. What’s the saying, :Those is glass minivans shouldn’t somethingoranother…”
Via Vancouver Sun:
A North Vancouver father is unable to work after being savagely beaten with a baseball bat in a case of road rage on Highway 1.
Ryan McCaffery was driving up the steep stretch of highway in North ...
4 tags
Happy Road Rage Free Friday!
Feel the groove. Feel it! FEEL IT NOW!
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How To Get Out Of A Speeding Ticket #1
I always thought that if you were a girl, you were supposed to show your tits, and cry. And do both of those things a lot.
I also thought that if you’re a guy, you are just shit out of luck.
That’s what I thought. That is, until Dr. Roadhead gave me the sage advice of, “don’t break the law.” That’s a good place to start I suppose.
My thoughts -...
5 tags
This Is Utterly Bad Ass. Unless People Were...
KA-BLOOOOOM! This is what happens when you try and swindle unsuspecting tourists by taking the scenic route around the city. Here’s your fucking tip Amkar Amdallah Boukaran Imdelloh!!
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#1 Fear of Most Americans. "Most Americans"...
Via the NYPost:
His life may have been saved by a traffic accident.
Cops called to a seemingly routine fender-bender in Manhattan made a startling discovery yesterday — a badly beaten man, bound at the hands and feet, with his ear nearly hacked off, in the trunk of a BMW, police sources said.
Like a scene from a mob movie, the mutilated man was found after cops probing the minor...
5 tags
Crooked Airport Cop Caught Carrying Clippers
Via NYPost.com:
BUFFALO, N.Y. — Authorities say they’re investigating a western New York transit police officer accused of taking home hundreds of items confiscated from passengers at the Buffalo airport.
It must be something good, like drugs or guns, right? Maybe some illegally smuggled Russian chicks?!
Niagara Frontier Transportation Authority officials tell WGRZ-TV that the officer...
2 tags
Beautiful Vantage Point
Snow gettin’ blown on Long Island. I feel like going all Beavis and Butthead on this pic, “huh huh, heh heh, huh huh.”
Via Newsday.com
MTA - Current Status (1/27/2011)
MTA Winter Weather Service Advisory
The MTA is working hard to restore service in the aftermath of a storm that dumped more than a foot of snow in parts of the region. Service is suspended in parts of the system as crews continue to remove snow and ice from tracks, switches, stations and roadways. Please check back to MTA.info for the latest updates, allow extra time and be careful when walking...
8 tags
Watch The Gap, Err, Open Door
I’m surprised this does not happen more often. I have seen it almost happens a slew of times, but that doesn’t count for anything really. Apparently a conductor was notified, and just like most conductors, they could give a shit because they’re weeks away from pension, or just hours away from the end of their day. And I don’t blame them. I would not want their job -...
There's always two sides to a story...
But what the hell could this woman have done to piss this guy off so incredibly bad? Perhaps, it was because she was a woman and he’s sexist. Perhaps, she had an ethic flag/CD combo hanging from her rear-view, and he’s racist. Perhaps, she was a Yankees fan. www.metrowestdailynews.com/news/police_and_fire/x1097218157/Framingham-man-charged-with-attacking-woman-in-fit-of-road-rage
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Those were my stinky feet on the train yesterday....
It snowed yesterday. I wore sneakers with dress socks to and from the train. As you are well aware, it’s a deadly combination. My sincerest apologies. But not really.
5 tags
You Can't Hustle a Hustler Homie!
You think I’m not going to ask you to move your bag off the seat? Especially with a crowded train?? You must be smokin’ somethin’ good! Move that shit. Now.
4 tags
Listen, I don't like you, and you don't like me.
At least that is what I assume when I sit next to you on the train. Nine-point-seven times outta ten, you prove my ass right.
5 tags
One Shot, No Kill
Guns are for pussies. And shooting guns at people, are for bigger pussies. Like this giant vagina who shot his gun once. http://www.signonsandiego.com/news/2011/jan/25/man-shoots-car-during-chollas-view-road-rage-incid/. He must have accidentally squeezed the triggah jiggah!
In His Defense, She Probably Deserved It?
We all know women suck at driving. If you argue with that last sentence, then you, are definitely a broad. This guy was in no mood. http://www.abc27.com/Global/story.asp?S=13903581
Why Commute When You can Work From Home?!...
Via some shitty site: www.workathomearticle.com/index.php/why-commute-when-you-can-work-from-home/
Will someone be so brazen and quit their job to do this? Please. I need to know, what’s it all about. I mean, I completely know it’s utter horseshit, but still. I need to know.
More Snow? Snow Shit! →
It just continues to snow in the NorthEast, making the commute for the idiots living there absolute hell. And it will continue on.
A Broken Clock Is Right Twice a Day Too →
5 tags
There Must Be a Better System
It’s 2011 folks. We can order pizza’s to our car using cell phones, but we can’t figure out a better, non-archaic method of collecting tickets on a fucking train? And they won’t even accept credit cards on board. Get a fucking paypal account you shitty transit authority you. Because everyone else has one. OR why not put a goddamn ticket machine ON the train. Innovation,...
4 tags
Why do you wait until it's below zero to switch up...
So, instead of the normal train that everybody and their mother that commutes are used to, including Conductors and Engineers, let’s use some older, crappier, and just plain annoying train cars. You know, the kind where, instead of standing in a covered vestibule inside the car when it’s packed, you have to wait outside the doors where you are basically exposed to the open elements....
5 tags
What I learned about taking the train when it's...
1. There is simply no way to stay warm while waiting. 2. The trains will invariably be late. 3. If you are stuck on a train that is jam-packed, get the fuck off because there is no reason to travel like a sardine to work. There will be other trains, and they will get you there eventually so get your ass off, go in to the station and get warm, and take another train.
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The question is, exactly how many beers do I grab...
If I drink one 16 ounce beer every 20 minutes, and my commute is one hour and twenty home, then I can easily deduce that I can slug exactly FIVE Coors Lights to pass the time. People all over the world, joins hands…
6 tags
Snow + Linoleum = Shit Waiting To Happen
If employees of OSHA had to commute to their offices on a snowy day using the MTA in New York, the entire transportation authority would be slammed with an astronomical fine. You see, when snow gets tracked into the train, it melts. When snow melts, it turns to water. When water pools on linoleum, it becomes slippery as a motherfucker. You would think someone would have thought about this. More...
6 tags
That was me this morning...
Yeah, the dick who did not clean any snow off his car. I don’t care for you or your safety, frankly. I’m lazy and do not feel like cleaning my car, plain and simple. The faster I drive, the quicker the powder blows off. If you are in my wake, tough titties to you then.
5 tags
Well, The Air Now Smells Like a Diaper
Whoever farted this morning on the train, you are a vile pig. I looked around and didn’t see one child in dirty diapers, yet that is exactly what the entire car smelled like. Hope you sharted a lil bit.
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G'head and Make Yourself at Home Why Do'ncha
Guy was rocking white tube socks under his loafers. From the waist up he looked respectable. From the waste down, he sure looked comfy.
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Excuse me sir, you have a Durex condom hanging out...
As you are going to grab your train ticket, I see your magnum sized condom just about to burst out of your wallet. First of all, do you think you might randomly get some ass on the train or anywhere really that you have to carry a GD rubber? And secondly, why keep it in your wallet? I know I absolutely loathe having anything more than two credit cards in mine because it hurts my back. And thirdly,...
5 tags
WTF is your lotion intended to smell like?
Because it sure smells a whole lot like bad-breath-armpits. You just had to put it on halfway through the train ride. I have been burning my nose hairs in an attempt to get this horrid smell out of my nasal.
6 tags
“I think I can I think I can…”
– Hey asshole - I applaud your effort at learning/using the English language,
but on the 6:32 train in the morning when the train stops for an extended
period of time, there is zero point in yelling, “No work! No work!” On
second thought, maybe you are talking about your employment...
5 tags
Ice-Capade Commute
It was so icy this morning, I think I would have had better luck with driving if I took OFF my tires and left just the rims.Doesn’t matter how-many-wheeled-drive you have when the road is straight frozen water. And you fucking shitty buses drive like you don’t have numerous civilian lives in the back of your vehicle. G’fuck yourself please.
4 tags
CALLATE!!!
Do you two really have to sit across the aisle from one another on this empty train and yammer on in Spanish? Granted, I have zero clue wtf you are actually saying, but I know it is mucho annoying. And you laughing in between is just absolutely grating. You twats, shut your fucking mouths, will ya.
5 tags
Bus Weaves During Fight on Bus as Weaves are...
That bus can drive until the wheels fall off, but no distance will take the ghetto out these bitches.
There’s not much to say. You saw it all, and the annoying narrator filled in the rest. Her poor children were forced to judge the fight. Which sucked btw. Should have been a ton worse seeing that it was two on one, but I digress.
Something to note here - that bitch is DEFINITELY not...
5 tags
Bus Weaves During Fight on Bus as Weaves are...
That bus can drive until the wheels fall off, but no distance will take the ghetto out these bitches.
There’s not much to say. You saw it all, and the annoying narrator filled in the rest. Her poor children were forced to judge the fight. Which sucked btw. Should have been a ton worse seeing that it was two on one, but I digress.
Something to note here - that bitch is DEFINITELY not...
7 tags
There Aint Enough Vodka To Dull This Headache.
There’s nothing worse than crazy people. Except for when they are completely buck naked (thanks for not turning towards the camera btw). No clue what is being said, but clearly it doesn’t matter — because crazytalk translates into any language seamlessly. But that sound…
That sound is just cringe-inducing. The heavy THUD of a skull hitting pavement instantly shoots...
7 tags
There Aint Enough Vodka To Dull This Headache.
There’s nothing worse than crazy people. Except for when they are completely buck naked (thanks for not turning towards the camera btw). No clue what is being said, but clearly it doesn’t matter — because crazytalk translates into any language seamlessly. But that sound…
That sound is just cringe-inducing. The heavy THUD of a skull hitting pavement instantly shoots...
4 tags
It's Called Playing the Odds. It's Also Called...
Arrived somewhat early to the train so I more or less had my pick of the litter of seats. Based on the layout of this particular train, I opted to go with sitting at the end of a three-seater. Chances were I wouldn’t have anyone pressed against me, and my ride would fly by. Now the problem was, which seat would it be.
At this point, most of the 3seaters were completely empty. And me...
4 tags
Subway's New 5 Dollar Footlong (Rat)
There has to be worse ways to wake up I’m sure. Sure, the hooker from last could have had a penis. Your breath could taste like latex. Or you are in a tub of ice with a phone that says dial 9-1-1. But I’m pretty sure this is right up there.
4 tags
Subway's New 5 Dollar Footlong (Rat)
There has to be worse ways to wake up I’m sure. Sure, the hooker from last could have had a penis. Your breath could taste like latex. Or you are in a tub of ice with a phone that says dial 9-1-1. But I’m pretty sure this is right up there.